Back when Hillary Clinton was a US Senator, her driver was taking the dumpy lesbian communist back from a trip upstate when they turned the sharp corner of a country road and struck a cow, killing the animal and damaging the limo...
Looking around, they found the nearest farmhouse- she sends the driver in to do the talking and explain what he'd done.
Hillary is waiting out in the car, 20, 30 minutes... and hour passes and still nothing.
She says to herself 'What's taking this damn idiot so long?' and storms up to the front door. As she approaches the driver comes staggering out, clothing disheveled, reaking of alcohol, lipstick on his collar, etc.
Hillary is livid, and lays into him good: 'What the hell were you doing in their for an hour?!?'
He says 'Look, the farmer made me sit down for a 20-year-old Scotch he uncorked, his wife handed me a Cuban cigar and hugged me so tight I thought I was going to die... then the smoking-hot 18-year-old daughter nearly ripped my clothes off as I attempted to make an escape!"
H: "What on Earth did you say to them?"
D: "All I said was 'Hello sir, I'm Hillary Clinton's limo driver, and I'm the one who just killed the old cow...' "