15 April 2014

TEST: You a Dem, a Republican... or a Texan?


You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges at you... 

You are carrying a SIG Sauer 9mm, and you're an expert shot. 

You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. 

 What do you do? 

Democrat's Answer: 

· Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

· Does the man look poor or oppressed?

· Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling?

· Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

· Could we run away?

· Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

· What does the law say about this situation? 

· Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it? 

· Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

· Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

· Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

· If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

· Should I call 9-1-1?

· We need to raise taxes.

· Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

· I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.

· This is all so confusing!


Republican's Answer:  BANG! 


Texan's Answer: 

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG ! BANG! BANG! BANG! -click- 

(sounds of reloading) 

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! -click- 

Daughter: 'Nice grouping, Daddy!' 

'Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or hollow-points?!  

Son: 'Can I shoot the next one?!' 

Wife: 'You ain't taking that thing to the taxidermist!


Thanks again Kirby