10 January 2012

Christopher Moltisanti Endorses
Mitt Romney for President

"Maybe it's the hair... reminds me of Paulie!"

New Jersey underworld figure Christopher "Chrissy" Moltisanti made a surprise endorsement of Mitt Romney for president today with an impromptu press conference at the renowned Bada Bing nightclub just off Exit 13 
(behind The Carpet Warehouse) in picturesque Trenton, NJ.

"He's got a big crew, and yeah- we've known them for some time now... Ralphie actually did some work on some of the Bain take-downs, classic pump-n-dump" said the temperamental thug.

Noting strong union support, Moltisanti stated "I sent Patsy down to the docks, da boys say Mitt's OK with them... and so as long as he stays away from the pension fund, he's aces with me."

"Mittens understands entrepreneurs like moi" claimed Moltisanti. "He doesn't let things get in the way of a deal. And did you get a load of how he ordered those hits on Palin and Gingrich- 
pure hoodlum... 
Gotti-esque, even!"

He went on to say "Oh man, the suits: that sealed the deal: got to find me out what he's wearing and jack a truckload of 'em down at the Port Authority".

"Look, Mitt's got the look, the attitude... cold as a fish, and above all a strong earner... what else could you want in a boss?" 

Major language alert (duh):


Teresa said...

We need to stop Romney from winning the nomination. I think Gingrich and Santorum need to team up to stop him.

Reaganite Republican said...

Agreed, T

After the Todd Palin endorsement, I was thinking Newt might pick SARAH as VP... stranger things!

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